A cancer diagnosis doesn’t just impact the body—it reshapes relationships, silences voices, and tests our ability to connect. Conversations that once felt easy can suddenly feel fraught with emotion, fear, or even avoidance. How do you express what you need without overwhelming others? How do you listen without assuming or shutting down?
These are the powerful questions addressed in our Cancer Care Parcel webinar, Navigating Difficult Conversations for People Affected by Cancer, led by Natasha Jivan—an experienced professional with nearly 20 years of insight supporting people through illness, trauma, and transition.
Natasha brings both expertise and lived understanding, having supported loved ones through cancer herself. Her practice, Collective Health Co, based in Queensland, Australia, helps individuals face life’s most difficult moments with clarity and compassion.
A cancer journey doesn’t just involve medicine—it involves people. During the session, attendees opened up about the quiet barriers that often appear in daily life. Some said they prefer to process things privately and speak when ready. Others shared how distressing it can be when family members avoid emotional conversations or misinterpret emotional tone. Even moments of calmness or clarity can be misunderstood as denial or avoidance.
This webinar offered not just comfort, but practical guidance. Natasha shared communication techniques designed to foster connection without pressure, and understanding without assumptions.
One of the key frameworks shared was Dr. John Gottman’s “Four Horsemen” model—criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling—four patterns that can quietly erode trust and connection, especially during high-stress moments. When these arise, Natasha encouraged participants to step back, name the pattern gently, and choose a new way to engage—one grounded in empathy rather than reaction.
Another important lesson was recognising that everyone copes differently. Some people are emotionally expressive. Others are more practical and prefer facts over feelings. Both are valid. Supporting someone isn’t about reshaping their personality—it’s about meeting them where they are.
Natasha also shared tools for creating “safe spaces” to talk. That might mean setting boundaries on when and how conversations happen—like choosing to talk for ten minutes during a walk, rather than scheduling a heavy sit-down discussion. Small changes in approach can make space for honesty and reduce overwhelm for everyone involved.
Several participants expressed anxiety about upsetting their loved ones or shared how difficult it can be when people assume they’re struggling when they’re not. There was a recurring theme of emotional misalignment—where intentions and interpretations don’t always match. Natasha’s advice? Don’t force disclosure, and don’t apologise for your way of coping. Instead, create opportunities for communication that feel natural and authentic to you.
One striking moment came when someone asked whether it's “wrong” to handle things in silence until ready to share. Natasha’s answer was simple: no. Each person’s journey is their own. Silence, reflection, humour, logic, even avoidance—these are all coping mechanisms. What matters is creating the possibility for dialogue—not forcing it.
Natasha Jivan has nearly two decades of experience in cancer support, mental health, and life transitions. Through her work at Collective Health Co, she helps individuals and families navigate difficult moments with practical tools and emotional resilience. Her approach is honest, grounded, and deeply compassionate.
You can find Natasha and her work at Collective Health Co on the website (https://collectivehc.com.au/)m Facebook and Instagram, where she shares mental health strategies, communication resources, and emotional support for those affected by serious illness.
This session is now available on demand. Whether you’re a patient, caregiver, friend or healthcare professional, we encourage you to listen. It’s a conversation worth having—and hearing.
